Relativity

This post is just something I figure out and find it interesting to share with. It might make some sense to relate basic scientific facts to our life.

Imagine there is a container with gas particles moving inside it randomly but following the fundamental laws of motion. They are atoms and molecules, the building blocks of any other complexes. Not going into too much scientific details, we know any atom would consist of subatomic particles such as proton, electron and neutron. In higher academic level, scholars divide these particles into quarks and leptons, and so on whenever new discoveries are made, possibly to be smaller than any scale we could ever imagine. In a simple way to draw up a conclusion, no matter how small the particles are, still, they are masses that occupy space, and undergo motions or are relatively stationary at any split second under the fixed ways they behave as one part of this world.

By understanding mass-energy equivalency, we know that our universe is at a dynamic environment yet constantly conserving its potential as a mass or energy as motion. By understanding Newton's first law, we can say an object would travel in a straight line with constant velocity or would not move provided no external force is exerted. I'm not going to give more examples of laws as it has clearly shown that the masses follow the rule, and this is the law of nature, which wouldn't change. No matter how complex a system is, none of the small mass could choose to defy these laws. In fact, they don't have the "ability" to "choose", they just obey whatever laws that are fixed.

Imagine a simple electrical circuit is set up by using copper wires, batteries and a light bulb. It would be complex enough to just look at the part of copper wire when the circuit is completed. There are multitude number of electrons moving at different velocities at any instant because each single electron would be situated at a totally different situation which is a combination of forces pushing or pulling the electron by different factors, such as electric field, magnetic field, gravitational field and so on. People do not normally take care of such a complexity as it is unnecessary to do so because by convention, any measurement is made under an error and uncertainty that may be omitted. It is impossible to be done as no super computer can handle such an intense calculation too. Thus, an ammeter that reads at particular sensitivity and accuracy will get the job done easier.

And the examples shown above derive from non-living things. This post would be a solely low level, not-so-precise and physics related academic post in general terminologies if I stop writing here. So I would like to relate the above statements to our life.

Living organisms, undergo movement and locomotion under controlled. In the kingdom of Animalia, if I'm not mistaken, all organisms have a nervous system controlled by the neuronal activity integrated organ called brain. The influx of sodium ions into the axon as well as the attachment of neurotransmitters into the receptors happening at synaptic cleft, which is the small gap between two neurons illustrate the simple concept of how the messages are being transmitted in the form of electrical pulses in these animals especially in human. No one knows exactly how our brains work, although some achievements have been made in brain researches to successfully identify different regions of brain separated by its functionality. It is even more complicated when we try to figure out and analyse how human mind works based on what the human population has understood at the perspective of science and logic.

Each human motion is controlled by the brain, the extremely complicated network of synapses and neurons with electrical messages being transmitted all time long. If I relate the natural law of motions into every mass included in this nervous system, and if and only if it is true, we, the human beings, are a set of combined masses, which obey the fixed laws, and cannot be changed by itself! Thus, the human motion is itself a natural act, controlled by the mind, which is an abstract representative of a network of "masses" that act naturally. Thus I would say, with each act that we have done, and act that we will have it done in the future, our life has been indirectly fixed, just like the way the laws are fixed. You might argue that we could change our mind anytime and refute this theory. As I've mentioned, each act, including changing our mind, is still being "controlled" by the neuronal activity, that would not "change" by itself. It is included.

Life is not just about an individual matter. It is the world, the interactions between people, the abiotic factors and biotic factors, the history and so on. We think, perceive, learn, and develop our mindset, and this is even more complex than the description of previous paragraph. Thus, I would symbolise every person as a mass, the influencing power as its inertia, and the historical background and abiotic factors as different fields, and there ends up being a mixture of content under different motions, following the laws! You could say, in a pessimistic way, that we cannot change what would happen in the future. Our fate and destiny has been written. Of course we can say we would fail the test without study, and we would have chosen to do that if we wanted. But now we have passed the test, and it happened out of many possible outcomes, but what happened is only that happened. There is only one result. If we shift the timeline to before the test, and it wouldn't be wrong to propose "no matter how your result is, it is fixed." This is an act, a happening, symbolised by the vector and magnitude of motion of a mass after a "collision".

So hereby I suggest a new relativity, the relativity of natural relation between each aspect stated above, and no matter what it is. Of course this is not fully a professional proposal and I'm just an ordinary student of age 19 who has only completed his A-Level course. This is definitely a theory with loopholes and flaws. But I just couldn't help to share this as it is really interesting.

And at some point, I believe it is true =)

Reflection (Part 1)

Having participated in Biro Tatanegara (BTN) course that lasted for five days, I'm going to share what was going on throughout the camp. I had the urge to share my point of views while I was having the course, however it is not easy to recall every single incident that happened and come out with an overall review based on what I had been thinking.

BTN, in case you have not come across with this term, and if I'm not mistaken, was introduced at the early age to mould the youngsters who were thought to raise disciplinary problems in school. Recently it was further modified to fulfill the need to instill patriotism in the government servants and those government-servant-to-be. I guess this is also one of those preventive measures in reducing brain drain.

We didn't have enough sleep during the course, but we did not need to worry about hunger. They provided six meals including breakfast, lunch and dinner daily. Teatime would fill in every empty slot of schedule. You would never feel hungry. There would be almost at least a piece of chicken and a fish for every participant in every meal, which is quite costly. The accommodation was the best part of the camp. We were provided a clean dorm with eight bunk beds and new furniture. The campsite is relatively isolated from the city and near to a beach, thus we would feel the calm and windy weather.

On the first day, I was so surprised to find out the campsite actually has a wifi source, and managed to steal some time and stay connected to Facebook for a while before our mobile phones were confiscated throughout the next four days. However most Maxis users received poor signals from the base stations of mobile phones in this remote area. Despite the fact that even if we took control of our own mobile phones, we cannot connect to the outside world with no signal coverage, still, I guess 107 of us were all having a hard time without mobile phone in our pockets.

The whole course was just mainly about presentations and group trainings that involves some aspects to build a civil minded and patriotic soul. Every morning we had to wake up at 5.30am, slightly late comparing to Muslims. We had to take part in so called moral lessons when the Muslims were attending for their morning prayers. After that there would be morning training session. I did not have any experience in marching or foot drill, and it is embarrassing and insulting when the commanders were no happy for he expected everyone of us must have joined a uniformed unit or national service before.

In my opinion, it is just a personal matter whether anyone of us chose to join a uniformed unit, and don't take that as a compulsory when it seems that joining a uniformed unit would greatly help one to obtain extra co-curriculum merit and secure your university seat. Just allow me to speak a little out of topic, I just find it ridiculous when people were so surprised to find out the fact that I, as a PSD scholarship holder, do not hold any certificate of a uniformed team at all. My point is simple, everyone has his or her own liking, interest and time management. When the government is practicing a moderate way of encouraging youngsters to take part in uniformed unit, we can make up our mind to give a full commitment in other kind of co-curriculum activities and the outcomes are beneficial as well.

Back to the marching part in every morning, I truly enjoyed the session as I learn something new instead of listening to cliche that has been aggressively reiterated during speeches given by trainers and facilitators. However when I further analyse the speech content as well as activities curriculum, I notice they had unevenly distributed what they want us to learn and understand in the course by national civic bureau. We were exposed to the content of constitution of Malaysia in different ways. However they just focused on some important clauses. According to the syllabus stated in the official website of national civic bureau, we are supposed to learn about the latest issues, patriotism, the nation history, the government system, social contract, constitution of Malaysia and others. However what had been greatly emphasised was the social contract and some particular facts included in the constitution. I'm glad to learn all of these, and eventually I catch the main point and agenda of the course, which is to indoctrinate participants to understand the social contract based on constitution. Not to say we learn only a little about others but honestly I was a little annoyed by the way it had been emphasised.

Nevertheless, at some point I'm still holding on to my ideology. I would reflect on it and figure out more to share with you next time.

BTN

Finally the final examination is over and this definitely puts my A-Level course to an end. I have given my best shot in eight of the papers and hopefully I would be able to obtain the newly introduced and also the highest grade of the grading system, A* (A star, quite similar to the A+ in SPM). Before going home, all of us would need to attend BTN (National Civics Bureau), a course that is prepared by the government for those students heading oversea in the future and others. The aim of this course is mainly about instilling patriotism by exposing each of us to historical lessons. This should be interesting, however I'm a little worried as when I was digging some information regarding this course, I came across with a lot of negative feedback. One of my seniors who has already taken the course advised me not to take what would soon be exposed to myself personally. Some controversy arose, and issues were discussed as some news reported that BTN has been proven unfruitful to fulfill the aim, and including some sensitive and biased remarks. At that time, our Prime Minister had shown up and promised the syllabus of BTN would be further speculated and made vary to synchronise the aim when political parties were hotly debating about whether to abolish this controversial course or not. So it remains until now, and it is my turn to experience it. I'm sure I would have a lot of stories to share here after this. Hopefully it does change in a positive way after coming across with intense criticism.

p/s : I spent a number of money, just to buy the strictly designated costume, and everyone needs to do so.

Censored

This is how the front cover page of TIME magazine gazetted in the first week of October should be.

I received it. But it has been censored by marker pen.

IELTS result

Finally the IELTS result is released! Here is my result:

Listening: 8.5
Reading: 8.5
Writing: 7.5
Speaking: 6.0 =(

Total: 8.5 + 8.5 + 7.5 + 6.0 = 30.5
Overall band score = 30.5/4 = 7.625 ≈ 7.5

Here is the reference of band score:

9. Expert User - native speaker level of the language.

8. Very Good User - excellent command of the language, a few mistakes only

7. Good User - handles language well, some inaccuracies, communicates adequately

6. Competent User - reasonable control of the language, difficulties with unfamiliar

5. Modest User - adequate in own area, difficulties with complex structures

4. Limited User - adequate only in familiar areas, difficulty understanding expression

3. Very Limited User - problems communicating, limited communication abilities

2. Intermittent User - many difficulties, basic information only

1. Non User - understands a few isolated words only

I am quite satisfied with the overall performance despite the poor response rated for my speaking test. However I can't recall much regarding the experience during the tests.

I tried my best and stretched my ears to the max during listening test. However I couldn't catch up the fast conversation by some speakers with thick British accent in one of the parts. I have got some luck to score well in reading test.

Although 7.5 is lower than 8.5, it is still considered as a relatively high band in writing. I think I did pretty well in that paper as I applied a wide range of vocabulary and structures of sentences in appropriate ways. I wouldn't have achieved this band if I did not force myself to pick up the habit of blogging and intensive writing since I failed to score well in SPM.

The examiner who conducted my speaking test was very professional. She is a woman of more than 60 and has a perfect pronunciation. However, she looked very unfriendly, serious and strict. I tried my best to give my best answer for every question or task given, but I just couldn't escape from the fate of getting such an unacceptable band. In fact, if I obtained a band higher than 6.0 for speaking, even by only an addition of 0.5, the overall band score would be 8.0 or higher! =)

In conclusion, IELTS test is interesting and exciting. Every candidate needs to pay full attention to focus on every test after a certain period of training and preparation. Having boosted with confidence, a little luck is still desired.

Respect our name

It has been a long time since I noticed quite a number of my friends have preferred people to address them by their own coined nickname. In my opinion it has nothing wrong to have a nickname for better recognition among newly met friends, as long as it is related to your abbreviation of your name, your character, your appearance and others. For example, my name is Jin Xiang. Some of my Malay friends find it hard to pronounce words starting with the alphabet "X", so I always recommend them to address me in the way they pronounce "Siang" in Malay language. Both of the words are homonym, moreover the word "Siang" brings the meaning of morning in their language. Some of my Indian friends have long names, so they abbreviate it.

Normally Chinese names would not appear to be too long nor too complicated. It usually consists of three words - rarely two or four, and the first word is the surname that enables you to track back your origins and the line of ancestors. For instance, my full name is Lui Jin Xiang, a typical Chinese name that does not fit into the first and last name system existing in Europe because people tend to relate first name to surname. In order to show my Chinese name as Lui Jin Xiang, it is a must to give my name by Lui as last name. We show respect to our ancestors, so we don't put it behind. So, for me it is a little annoying to categorise my surname as last name.

Perhaps you don't know, or even some of the Chinese don't even feel the importance and underlying obligation to be proud of your surname as well as your name given by your parents. It shows a good example of how influential it can be, when we come across with some historical facts of some heroes sharing the same surname with us did something great, we would feel glad and honored. How if that person had been notorious? We would really feel guilty and sorry for him. There lies an invisible link among Chinese of same surname. How about the name given by your parents? Do you think it does not carry any meaning? Or they had not been considerate enough to give you a unique name you desire?

And here comes the main point of updating this post. I do wonder what the motive of getting an unnecessary nickname is. I have no comment on people who changed their names because of some beliefs and religious needs. I guess every Christian would need to add an English name in front of their surnames for the reason I have not discovered. However sometime I sense that several of those who changed their names, either in a formal or informal way, have shown disrespect to their own identities and sheer western advocacy. Maybe you don't like to live with your current name because it is too common, fine, reflect on what you have omitted, feel obligated and rectify it. The reason is simple. It is your identity granted by your parents! Appreciate the only naming system that conserves you and your ancestors' identity relations.

Abolish examinations?

I can still barely remember the title of continuous essay I chose to elaborate on while taking English paper during SPM examination in year 2008. It was asking for the advantages and disadvantages of examination. I thought I had given my best shot and expected to score a satisfying result, but I had to face the fact that my essay could only rank B4 in the 1119 paper (it is the English subject of GCE O-Level examination) when the result was released.

Based on what I read, examination was first introduced in ancient China when the emperors required a system to evaluate the nationwide scholars. Their knowledge of history, their personal virtue and capability in handling or solving problems such as military dilemma and economic crisis would be heavily tested within continuous days, restlessly. Passing the exam was a prerequisite before scholars are awarded the authority of managing a designated mission as "cabinet member" or what has been famously known as "guan", the court officer who was involved in judiciary decisions. During that particular period, serving the government under the emperor's name was the ultimate ambition of every man. They had no choice but sit for examinations.

After centuries, examination is seen to have assimilated into different nations. It eventually becomes one of the most common evaluative measure conducted to different groups of people in various ways, but with a similar objective. Examination has always been hotly debated for its disadvantages as what is happening recently in our society of Malaysia. Policy makers announced it is the time to reevaluate this measure as it seems to bring more harm to students. At the same time, people are suggesting the need to modify the flawed education system by reintroducing a relatively dynamic learning method under an atmosphere that appears to be more conducive and less stress. The most possible outcome is that one or more significant examinations would be abolished.

In my opinion, straight to the point, examination is a system that was well practised for a long term of time before people could really find out its harm. Further analysing would tell us the colossal and accumulative stress does affect the students adversely. However I believe moderate stress is the best motive force that keeps our pace in track when we own a target to achieve.

Another thing we concern is, how are we going to handle the problem of a large number of fresh graduated primary school student with "unknown potential" in their enrollment of secondary school? Apparently there must be a final exam such as UPSR to do this job.

PMR might seem less significant, thus it would most probably be abolished. However, when we reflect on the benefits of taking PMR, candidates can actually find out whether he should prepare himself to pick up subjects of art stream or science stream. Having prepared in PMR, students can be mentally prepared to sit for SPM too.

Examination in Malaysia has been mechanized and doing not-so-good in its quality control. It can be improved, but not easy though. I am wondering why the policy makers do not prefer to modify it before getting rid of it.

Whether there will be a real abolishment or not, this is the critical moment whereby people's concern has finally brought about some stirred movement in the cabinet. However, this is also the moment when a considerate attitude is needed to reach a compromise, or else the latest generation of students in Malaysia will get trapped in the uncertainties in their fate.

If the government does take care of this issue so much, do remember to reevaluate the recognition of Unified Examination Certificate (UEC) of Chinese Independent High School and tune the huge injustice gap existing between the preuniversity programmes.

I remain positive to receive the next news.

The controversy

Since it was announced that the grading system is slightly changed to introduce a higher distinction namely "super distinction" for SPM, I had been wondering how it would result in a different outcome regarding the proportion of candidates scoring the so called perfect result in a particular subject or all of the subjects taken, which have been limited to 10+2.

A grading system is like a measuring tool. It is designed to measure something. It should be moulded and calibrated considering the main aspects - is it too long or too short to measure the full size of the object? Is it sensitive enough such that smallest division used is helpful to give a reading including the significant figures needed? Can it be used to measure different objects, and give a comparison of them? A bad tool is not meant to be a bad tool as it might still be useful to measure other objects of different requirements. Applying the same analogy, I soon realised the new grading system is not competent enough to calibrate the candidates nationwide from the same batch in a credible and sensible method.

The SPM wouldn't be so important if it hasn't been included in the main consideration taken into account while the government department such as Public Service Department or other party such as National Bank is going to determine scholarship winners. Therefore SPM result is often related to these scholarships because they are closely linked. To maximise the chance to qualify oneself as the applicant and at the same time secure such scholarships, scoring a perfect result is necessary. It could be scoring all A1 based on the previous grading system or all A+ based on the current grading system. These are so called "perfect result" which would guarantee you, or at least it is very hard to deprive your chance to secure the scholarship provided by government. This is why candidates used to take more insignificant subjects, leading to improvement made to the examination system whereby maximum number of subjects taken has been limited. However, the flawed remains flawed until today due to the lack of transparency as some parties are still seeking for explanation for the unsolved yet prolonged problems, or even some conspiracy as mentioned by others.

How if there are too many perfect scorers? I didn't expect to know there is a large number of "perfect" scorers nor did I believe it if approximately 90% is the official threshold as reported. I'm not certain whether the number of candidates who managed to score A+ for any subjects is almost equal to the figure of the previous batch of candidates, however and still, there is something very obvious and provoking - the steep gradient between Chinese subject and any other subject. All of that is just playing with the normal distribution. Apparently it is not hard to set a threshold with the marks needed as the responding variable based on the proportion of the distribution required artificially. For example, if we want only 8% of those, let say 10000 of them who take a particular subject to get an A+, we can easily determine the threshold of the marks needed for the A+ by considering the lowest marks obtained by the candidates in the 8% of distribution. We might question how if the overall performance has greatly declined and what other changes should be made. In this case, a smaller proportion can be selected, for example, 5% or lower. Therefore, this flexible method is not applied blindly, but considering all the possible situations with a fair solution.

It has been a known fact that the "hardest" subject appears to be Chinese subject. In case you don't know how "hard" it is, you can ask any of your friends who were sitting for SPM in 2009 and could proudly tell you he or she had gotten an A+ in that subject. I don't have an official figure nor statistic for this, but it is fairly easy to spot the flaw when you heard there is only one hundred and more candidates scoring A+ nationwide, while a school could have equal number of candidates achieving the same result for any other subject. Why is the percentage of proportion scoring A+ for Chinese is less than 1% while other subjects can have relatively high percentage such as 8% or even more than 10%? All we need is an explanation.

Put the grading system of SPM aside, I would like to share some of my views towards the distribution of PSD scholarship. I used to think it is the best to give away the scholarship to the best brains. However when I further reflect on this issue, I think of wealth gradient among the people in our country and the way our government is trying to minimise gradient. We can't let the people in poverty to stand in the tight competition alone, that's why some policies such as free tax or extra subsidy are introduced so that they can have a better living condition, although it is still considerably terrible. This issue would be less controversial if everyone understands that. However it is not easy to protect everyone...

[To be continued...]

Change or not change?

I'm currently operating Compaq Presario C700 notebook which is relatively old considering the fact that my father had been using it installed with Windows XP for years ago before passing it to me. Now it appears to be terminally ill. The fan is constantly giving out irritating noise as if it is overworking although the cooling effect is fairly dissatisfying. I suspect the easily accumulated heat is one of the factors contributing to the occasional system lagging. However there are credits I can still give. I particularly enjoy the sensation of typing on its keypad. As a gamer, despite the graphic limitations that allow its user to run only gaming applications with low graphic requirements, I love the widescreen too.

My Sony Ericsson K618i has been following me for more than three years, it is gradually exposing its glitches too. The main faulty aspect that annoys me is the "instant auto-shutdown" of my phone. Whenever I insert it into my pocket and walk for some distance, it would automatically shut down, causing inconvenience as people can't reach my phone to give me a call. The phone needs only a small knock from sideways to slump into unconsciousness. I guess it must be the battery being unable to hinge to the terminal in an appropriate and functional way. To type instant messages in Chinese has caused me a hardship too. It takes a long time to fully read the pinyin (the standard system of Roman spelling in Chinese). Therefore it is considerably slow and insensitive. Furthermore, the metal plates which are responsible for adapting the charger are severely corroded. Whenever I want to charge my phone, I have to give it a "comfortable position" so there is current passing through the loosely connected junction, not to mention it might break and cut the circuit if slightly disturbed.

Actually I don't mind using old products as long as they are still capable of performing routine tasks in a satisfying way to users. However if I'm given the chance, I would certainly change both of them, or at least one of them. My parents are generous enough to sponsor whatever I want without further consideration, but I don't really want to spend too much of their money on my needs without further consideration too. I thought of smartphones, especially iPhone that has dominated the recent market with its cool-looking features. I thought of laptops my roommate recommended to me by introducing a lot of terminology which is not layman-friendly such as those modeling codes of hardware. I'm clear that I have to be clear to my requirements before choosing any product from the vast available options I can simply grab.

I do hope to accept any suggestions you might be able to share with me.

Is it that hard to compromise?

Having only healthy vegetarian food in my college hasn't been as convenient as what I think it could potentially be. There are only two cafeterias inside the college compound, one is Mamak cafeteria providing mainly Indian orientated food and one is Malay cafeteria which is just situated one floor below my apartment unit. There are two other ways to get your stomach filled - from the food stalls at the roadside opposite KTT, or from the food catering aunty whom we call her Aunty Mira.

Under normal circumstances I have no problem at getting nutritious vegetarian food at a reasonable price for every breakfast and lunch. Mamak cafeteria provides trays of mixed vegetables in buffet style. By paying only RM2.50, it is quite a considerable saving for a happy meal. It would be a little expensive to cater my lunch by filling up my own container at the stall prepared by an old woman who has her secret recipe attracting a great number of loyal customers every afternoon. To my personal liking, I would rather pay RM3.50 for delicious bean-based vegetables and potatoes.

After having my dinner just now, I had a conversation with the senior person in charge at the counter, and I felt a little offended when I was trying to compromise the flawed way in charging the food price. To order vegetarian food without frying, I have only limited options, that is to order foods separately. It is very unreasonable to get charged RM5.00 for a plate of white rice with an egg and a plate of mixed vegetable considering the fact I could have eaten a plate of fried rice with almost equal or even greater quantity of mixed vegetable and rice by paying only RM3.00. When I asked if it is possible to charge less since it is imbalanced in comparison with other options in the menu, I was fairly surprised that at first he replied which price I prefer in a harsh way, and grumbled something like you shouldn't order if you don't like to, instead of have considerations compromised whereby it is easy to set a fixed reasonable price to the combination above, at least for vegetarian food.

I can be a picky eater when it comes to healthy food, or choosy in catering food. I haven't been taking any fried chicken in KTT since months ago. Besides, I would really feel guilty whenever I use a polystyrene box or plastic bag. I don't mind washing extra containers by myself and I think it is time for everyone to show some concern towards the current main global issue especially those who are highly selective like me, but in a different way - rather to dine in his own apartment which would in turn result in a used polystyrene box for each meal taken. I couldn't say it is indifference shown, but it is another ironical scene to look at because well educated people would have reflected on what they should do before getting it done, however in this case, it is clearly seen that because of the long term habit practiced so they don't feel like holding any obligation.

Untitled (You may suggest one.)

Perhaps I shouldn't have concerned too much. Perhaps I should respond to all unpleasant sight by just a smile, and stay happy because it actually favors us. No criticism, no so called "harsh comments" or "inappropriate action". Perhaps I shouldn't have placed my perspective of views in equal to those, which in turn would easily spark some misunderstandings. Perhaps I should be one of those saying: "Aiya, like that one la, why care so much?" Or perhaps I should just remain silent, be your obedient students and get focused in term of academic attention, score a string of As in examination, or try to secure the top in the world award to appease them before flying to India, then leave here and be happy ever after.

But I don't. To refrain myself from the urges to share something neglecting its fact as either positive or negative has been something more difficult than to keep my mouth shut. Some people don't understand the fascinating and intriguing part we could indulge ourselves in during arguing against a statement or topic by contributing constructive thoughts, and have a great assimilation of others' thoughts, so that things can eventually end up obtaining a valuable outcome. Curiosity and sense of accomplishment are playing a main role. People tend to lost the interest concerned in the sense that he doesn't prefer to share his very personal piece of two cents could be a result of flawed environment he was being brought up. For example, the repeating cliche during constructing an essay without really trying to inject some fresh ideas whenever possible, could curb his sharing ability.

When something has been done with a large margin of improvement, I speak. When I saw something flawed or wrong, I speak. Before I speak, I do something which most of the people don't, that is I reflect on whether I'm trying to contribute to, or encourage the flawed or to the wrong. At the same time, we can't dispute the fact if we don't stay in the flawed, we are the ones who face disadvantages. It can be a hard time to balance everything during this stage, but this is what prepares us to have equipped all of the traits needed in order to push ourselves to a further level of aptitude in the future.

We can choose to show indifference towards the flawed, because of "it is none of my business, as long as I happy, it doesn't matter." or "I can't do much to change that, don't let myself to get into trouble, so just let it be." Here is a question to think: Are we entitled to do so? And here comes a good lesson to learn - to be able to achieve the goal with minimum arousal of less significant circumstances which might in turn lead to a complication that may defeat the purpose of the initial intention. Expect the unexpected and accept the unacceptable. Which one do you choose?

What's wrong? Can't you sense it?

Here is the previous post of the similar topic.

Forwarded emails urge me to voice out my opinion here again. Can we call the reaction of someone saying "Oh, that's cruel, we shouldn't do that!" while reading emails spreading news about killing of animals on the verge to extinct as human conscience? I have been trying to get involved in arguments such as humans have no right to deprive animals of their life regardless of their status or species. Whenever I read the typical comments cursing those inhumane sin done by either illegal butcher or hunter, especially on Facebook, I couldn't help myself to have my two cents pointed out in order to further scrutinize, review and try to bring an ironical sense into this issue.

For example, there was a documentary video showing seals' misfortune, suffering from the peeling of their skin by human in order to meet the high demand of raw material in leather industry. As expected, all the response towards this revealed sin could be generalised as rantings, condemnation and criticism accompanied by some cursing, or some of them might not even have the courage to continue watching because it was just too evil. For a greater understanding, I tried to make a simple comparison with the killing of poultry so that we could equate the cruelty of human act. Actually when we are taking meat from chicken and beef, we do contribute in this too.

Then, people started to refute my argument, stating that there is an obvious difference due to the reason torture and killing are not the same, and the sin of killing is definitely lower than the sin of torturing. They solidified their arguments Humans were created by god to be a "caliphate" on this earth and permitted to take advantage of all the natural resources there, but not to torture fellow creatures.

I have to admit the idea I advocate to is greatly influenced by teaching in Dharma talk. If you are not familiar with that, I would like to tell you that killing is prohibited, even killing an ant. And here comes the contact between religious views.

I do agree they are different above the surface, and I am trying to find an alternative perspective from the identity they share. I don't have the intention to defy any of the religious views but it is just intriguing for me to have a deeper insight towards this. Since both of them are sins and people don't wish to conduct any sinful practice, and logically and rationally people would say: "No, I don't want it to be like this." or "It is so wrong, we shouldn't do these." We would have criticized sinful people using different extent of phrases based on ascending "degree of sin". But for me, it brings contradiction when people would actually consider these as antonym, humane and inhumane.

If you read carefully, my point is very simple, that is "do not feel sorry or guilty for the animals when you are reading similar email or whatsoever, if you are dining in meat, such as KFC, perhaps?

There is another fascinating fact I would like to share. Whenever we flipped through the newspapers, bad news such as murdering and kidnapping would not fail to meet our eyes. Have you ever noticed that we have our own scale on judging the degree of sin conducted by those criminals? Sometime the scale would go imbalanced. For instance, when a little adorable girl was kidnapped, the newspapers would have some argh-she-is-so-cute photos gazetted to draw the attention of the public. Same analogy, people would look at the photo and say "where the hell do those kidnappers grow their conscience? How can you be so harsh to such a cute little girl?" How if miserably the victim doesn't have an attractive look? There is no an one hundred and eighty degree of change by public response, of course, but you can actually notice the great difference.

Things are artificial, and fake as well.

FESKOTT

Finally the sports festival that lasted for a week in my college has ended. Here comes the time to review and analyze the event namely Festival Sukan Kolej Teknologi Timur (FESKOTT).

FESKOTT includes many games, for instance football, netball, volleyball, futsal and track events such as short distance sprinting. This festival didn't only confine its participants to A-Level students but also lecturers and students taking other diploma course. We were categorized into four main contingents having more than two hundreds of members each. Basketball match was introduced to meet our demand, but the organizer shouldn't have ignored some events, which could be carried out in a stadium, in this case, the stadium located 3km from my college. It was not a great deal to apply for the access of using those facilities in order to provide us the opportunity to take part in events other than sprinting. Personally I feel it was quite disappointing and a little unfair. Not all of us are sprinters, and those having strong arms and excellence hopping ability couldn't have their potentials utilized.

I took part in volleyball, the game that I have been deeply indulged in since my first exposure towards this teamwork requiring sport. With great skills we had made our way into the final but stumbled, and ended up getting my first silver trophy of volleyball competition. Apart from that, as one of those who urged the organizing of basketball competition, I grouped a team of five players and won the champion with perspiration and luck, and I was quite surprised to be awarded the best player.

During the closing ceremony.

Despite some unpleasant sight or inconvenience, FESKOTT can still be considered a memorable and joyful event. It greatly depends on how you treat it. Effort would normally and eventually pay off. It is also time to keep my pace on the "academic track" for that pre AS Level examination is just around the corner.

I'm officially 19 years old =)

Notifications of Facebook and text messages started to pile up within my laptop and handphone to the extent that although my fingers were working frantically, I couldn't manage to reply the all birthday wishes on time, all of these happened when it was near 12am of 22nd March.

I remember whenever it was my birthday, my family wouldn't fail to celebrate it, either inviting my friends to my birthday party or having a special dinner together. But this time it is fairly different.

I felt so warm, mainly because of that I was greatly surprised by my family. I sensed something fishy at 9pm yesterday as my sister suddenly asked me the song I like the most. Out of my expectation, they made a four-minute-video including the compilation of photos since my childhood moment running in slide show mode, to wish me a happy birthday which had been previously done for 18 consecutive years in my own house. Thank you Papa Mama, Jin Sheng, Jin Yao, Mei Mei and Ngen Ngen =) It is the best present I have ever received!

Lovely written cards from my friends.

At the same time I received a handmade birthday card from her! =) It was agonizing to have the envelope in my hands but I had to wait for 4 days until I was valid to open the envelope. Those words in the card tug deeply at my heartstrings, but I would like to apologize for not revealing them for the-reason-you-should-know =)


A mixture of old friends, relatives as well as my teacher and even my favourite lecturer left their wishes on the wall of my Facebook profile. I appreciate that very much =)

Things turned crazier when my friends planned to trick me in a cafe outside my college.

Ouch >.<"

I finally know how a face bumps into a cake feels. I know whose idea this is!

Here is the second vanilla cake. I like vanilla so much!

Thank you for enlightening my birthday =)

Birthday, in another perspective which is often emphasized by saints, is actually exactly what we can call it as a "disastrous day" of our mother. So instead of just having a blast with friends, we should actually spend some time on that day to reflect on how those days passed by when we were being ignorance but gradually raised and educated by our parents with great care and love after giving birth to us. 19 years has just gone in just a glimpse, what is left is what has remained in my memory, and I shall cherish every moment I had, which I only had.

No, I don't prefer this one.

This question can be interesting, how does your seat in your current college or university look like? Do you feel comfortable with the designated lecture hall or classroom you enter every weekday and spend hours of time dealing with the new syllabus or enduring the sleep-inducing tone by your lecturers? I guess everyone of you have no problem recognising the "tuition chair" ( I couldn't find any suitable word to name it. ) with the small flipping board. Yes, it is small, and brings a lot of unpleasant moment whenever I am to sit on it, which in turn urges me to voice out my personal opinion regarding this popular facility provided throughout the Malaysia.

Honestly, when I was a primary school kid, I was sick of sticking myself on the old wooden table with drawer and chair whole day long. At the same time, I used to have a funny thought that sitting on the tuition chair must be very comfortable, cool-looking or any adjective that describes something good.

Now I realise the chair doesn't bring as much joy as I expected. The main aspect that fails to withdraw my affinity towards the chair is the small flipping board, or perhaps I should call it the small pad. All of us bring our pencil box during lesson, and thanks to the small area that cannot even accommodate a normal textbook, our pencil box would always end up laying on the floor beneath the chair.

It drives me mad whenever I'm trying to solve any question with the aid of a calculator. There is no sufficient space to get calculator a good spot, but to place it above the paper. I come out with a good solution to avoid the calculator blocking the text in paper, that is to place it on my thighs. And at this time you can pay attention using your ears. Trust me, occasionally there will be sound of calculator hitting the ground as a result of falling down, and after that I know how strong our calculator is to withstand the impact and remain intact after collision, nice quality control, Casio.

Actually every invention would come in handful in particular aspect. The tuition chair can serve better, but not in KTT. I prefer sitting on an ordinary chair, having ample space to have my work done comfortably on an ordinary table. Hah, just a personal rambling, do tell me if you have the same feeling :p

Flawed?

It has been more than 8 months since 6th July of year 2009 when I registered myself as one of the students in Kolej Teknologi Timur to enroll on Cambridge A-Level program under the scholarship awarded by JPA. Here is the schedule of the 18 months (1.5 years) I would like to share.

The A-Level program comprises two main examinations we have to go through. The syllabus is divided into half, which in short namely AS and A2. Both of them account for 50% of the total marks that would in turn determine the grade (A, B and so on) each. Theoretically I could have 9 months to deal with AS syllabus and another identical duration for A2. However I have to wait until the May and June to take AS papers, and there starts the A2 syllabus before the examination. When is the A2 examination? 4 months after AS examination.

So, I am wondering why the schedule is fixed in this way. I do not have any intention to bring about my own dissatisfaction towards the imbalanced schedule, as I would have decided to take STPM that includes all the syllabus in only one final examination, if my SPM result failed to attract any scholarship. Moreover, some friends of mine here are actually enduring a tough stage - they have no other choice but are forced to complete the same syllabus within one year, not to mention the entrance exam to pass as one of the prerequisites to grab a seat in any prestigious universities abroad. While some of them might be proud of that only Malaysia can provide the insanely shortened duration of A-Level program in this way, it seems that none of us are actually aware of the improper management to plan the foundation course provided to scholarship holders based on the dates of intakes stated by particular universities.

In my opinion, A-Level is not as tough as STPM in term of the academic coverage, but it does take time to fully prepare ourselves before stepping in the examination hall to apply what we have learned. This is just my little concern as a Malaysian blogger, who welcomes anyone to clarify anything I might have missed or pointed out wrongly, or justify the need to change, for a positive outcome.

The Chinese New Year Celebration

It was two days ago when we had a blast in my college presenting the Chinese New Year celebration after weeks of preparation in hurry. The main aspects of this activity such as program, food and decorations were well done in the sense that we have got a very positive feedback from those VIPs as well as from our college mates. I was mainly in charge of decorative procedures and exhibition, that means I was no doubt one of the busiest men, so it is a kind of relief accompanied by satisfaction and joy to have this project done, not perfectly, but I'm certain that at least it has thrilled everyone in my college by which they could actually sense the Chinese New Year ambiance and explore more about our culture and tradition under such an exposure.

This backdrop is 100% handmade using "raw materials" such as mahjong papers, red papers black ink, glue etc. It is superb isn't it? =)

We invited a lion dance troupe to invite the VIPs and perform during the opening ceremony.

The spring couplet in the form of scroll rolling down after pulled by VIPs at the main entrance of the hall.
We normally read the couplet starting from the right one, from top to bottom. To translate, it simply brings the meaning of "Golden ox embarks on a new journey and there comes the tiger indicating the arrival of spring."

She is the head of our college, we call her "Datin". Her expression tells me that she might be wondering what those Chinese characters mean, perhaps?

Our very first show was traditional dance including eight of us dancing using Chinese fan and lanterns. I am the one holding the red lantern at a lower level.

This is another meaningful scene. They are taking part in "laosheng", using chopsticks to toss the raw fish salad high in the air. Fish is a homophone of "abundance" in Chinese, therefore it symbolises prosperity and auspiciousness.

The VIPs showing their calligraphy of a single word namely "tiger". This word is relatively complicated, so I guess they wouldn't have written such an readable masterpiece if I didn't use a pencil to provide a draft of the strokes on those pink papers :p

I did take part in the choir too. It was a wonderful experience to perform Chinese New Year song in full traditional attire with a group of friends!

The martial arts known as wushu in Chinese. Can you notice there is a Malay guy? :D

This lovely lady has a great voice! She sang folk song in the way opera singers sing, how wonderful!

'This guy is proficient in playing Chinese yo-yo.

Ribbon dance.

Mandarin oranges eating competition.

The middle guy is transformed into the God of Wealth and Fortune. The costume is handmade too!

The VIPs are trying to write 恭喜发财 (Gong Xi Fa Cai).

They are my favourite lecturers =)

VIPs visiting the displaying boards during exhibition.

You wouldn't have managed to come out with a correct estimation if you didn't know how much Chinese likes the number 8!

I particularly like these two photos.

I notice that although there are not many Chinese in my college, there are still a number of talented people interspersed in the nerd-looking scholarship holders. I have received some compliments regarding the decoration that worked under my mastermind, but I still need to declare that without the helping hands, I could not make it. I really enjoyed these hectic weeks which severely replaced my revision schedule, despite the fact that I am now slightly lagged behind in term of academic syllabus.

The hectic and memorable holidays

I have been relatively busy throughout these weeks as well as holidays. Make it short, my friends and I in Kolej Teknologi Timur are having a hard time preparing the first activity under the name of newly formed Chinese Cultural Education Society (CCES), which is the Chinese New Year celebration. Even when I'm now approximately 700km away from my college, I still have to compete with fast-running time to have my "homework" done and bring it back to Sepang.

I am the one leading the work related to decoration. I couldn't help scratching my forehead while trying to figure out a full plan concerning how the main hall which doesn't look like a hall at all, should be decorated. Certain artworks cannot fit to the framework of my initial planning due to limitations such as those pillars obstructing the vision towards the stage (actually there is no stage) and the extremely low ceiling. As I mentioned, my college is actually further modified and equipped from shops on an incline plane, so you can imagine the main hall consists of four lots of different height interconnected by staircases of three to four levels. I can even knock my head on the ceiling if I jump forcefully, no kidding.

We are going to get ourselves a formal exhibition displaying Chinese culture as well as Chinese New Year tradition. I searched and gathered the information needed using days and it took me another week to complete thirty slides of PowerPoint and those A3 size papers would be printed in full colour. At the same time I had to complete more than 20 pairs of spring couplets. It was overwhelming tired.

When there is motion, there is also friction. Thing doesn't come as smooth as we wish. 24th is the day of CNY celebration, however those inconsiderate allocate some candidates to take their internal examination until one day before 24th, that means we don't really own enough time to put on our decorative stuff in the main hall. It is even saddening and disastrous to receive the order calling us to take off our red tassels which had been set on ceiling before holidays. I am fairly annoyed and irritated, but what can I do?

Besides, I need to spare some time to manage my another private blog written in Chinese. Not to mention it is now the time I have to cope with the A2 syllabus. Much effort should be invested. Nevertheless, I still enjoy keeping myself busy with this activity. It somehow brings reminiscence of days I was busy with willingly committed activities during my secondary school life.

Honestly, I am starting a new relationship, my first relationship. I guess my family wouldn't even know that until they reach this line in my blog. Yes, we had a great time despite the fact I could hardly choose a time to hang out with her as I needed to respond to some gathering invitations. People were intrigued as I changed my relationship status on my Facebook profile. I would have revealed her identity if I wished to and I just hope everything can behave and go naturally =)

After this I would upload certain photos of this, or perhaps photos of my girlfriend and I =)

The Beneficial Course

In the last two days, I spent my time in Lu Jiang Cultural Centre located just a stone throw away from The Mines shopping Mall. It was a two days and a night course or camp held under the support of more than 20 college mates having an intention to explore more about Di Zi Gui (弟子规).

Di Zi Gui is an ancient Chinese teaching advocated by Confucius, where it has influenced a lot of learners to behave positively and wisely. It is not only a compilation of intelligence inherited from the Chinese ancestors, it also serves as a guidance to a happy life. Some people might have misconception such that Confucianism is religious and it could pose conflicts to their existing mindset about the way to live their life. In my opinion, unless you have not been exposed to those Chinese historical stories or anecdotes at all, you would at least have a sense of resonance with the Confucian teaching because Di Zi Gui is closely related to the analogy extracted from those allusions.

We reached the centre at about 8.30am on the last Saturday. A teacher welcomed us through a polite ninety degree bow. We were really surprised as a man with approximately three times our ages could show his respect to us in this way. He spoke softly, gracefully and gently. This is a trait we could seldom come across with especially in this modern era with everything should have done quickly and harshly. The place is clean and interspersed with traditional Chinese decorating. Lanterns, calligraphy couplets, wood carvings, the ambiance had really thrilled me as I have a great interest in these! The staff were dressing in samfu and cheongsam too!

The courses were fantastic and insightful! Because we had only two days and a night, the courses were tightly packed. I particularly salute Teacher Song, a kind woman whose great proficiency of linguistic skills were shown in her fluent speech conducted in many languages and even dialects!

We were introduced to Di Zi Gui, learned about practicing healthy vegetarian diet and sharing of allusions which I miss a lot since primary school. Di Zi Gui is based on eight-fold virtues: 孝(filial piety), 悌(brotherhood), 忠(loyalty), 信(trustworthiness), 礼(propriety), 义(righteousness), 廉(cleanliness), 耻(shame).


There was a session of movie sharing. I strongly recommend the Korean movie to you, namely "The Way Home" which tugged at my heartstrings to the extent that I phoned my grandma after that to express my love to her which I had never done before. However she didn't seem to have any response to my words. I expected, as I have written somewhere in my blog that my family is very conservative, we don't take much obvious action to express our love to each other. However, we do know how much we love each other.

Talk about love, I eventually realised that family love is the foundation of love, it is the fundamental relationship that everyone has the responsibility to carry. How could we expect ourselves to have a true friendship, or to have a long term and "high resistance" relationship with the one we have chosen, or in my case, to have the compassion needed in my future profession towards the patients, if we have failed to do so to our family?



An ideal place to live =)

Save the planet?

With the life threatening catastrophes happening all around the Earth and global warming approaching, human beings have realized the statement regarding the end of their civilization on this planet might soon become a reality. The leaders of the leading countries are currently trying to compromise on their responsibilities in slowing the effect of global warming by holding a series of incessant international workshops and so called “the G8 summit”. The main and mutual target achieved is to reduce their massive carbon dioxide emission respectively, for example, China should attempt to reduce 50% of that by taking appropriate and urgent incentives by the year 2020 if I’m not mistaken. However this could undoubtedly bar the countries involved from achieving a new height in terms of economic development. When each of them is suspicious about the happening of possible circumstances that some of their “alliance” might be trying to opt for violating the agreement made to overtake the others economically, the compromise is at stake at this very moment where global warming time bomb is on the verge to have entirely exploded. It seems that all of us have been brainwashed that the green house gases emitted by burning fuels do all the matters. We are encouraged to carpool, use public transports and so on, we point our fingers to car and factory exhausts when we are asked about the factors contributing to global warming. Miserably, most of us have omitted a greatest approach we could practice to tackle this existing yet “hard-to-eradicate” problem, which is just very simple – become a vegetarian.

Although I always remain sceptical towards all kinds of statistics and researches made to draw a conclusion proving something the professionals intended to, there is one I would like to refer assuming it is credible – if we make use of all the crops as the source of human food, no one on this planet would starve, even if we don’t have those harvesting machines. To elaborate on it for those who never came across with this, I would like to tell you, our food is turned into meat in large ratio. Why? In general, crop such as wheat is used to feed poultry, across the trophic level, approximately 90% of the energy would be lost, therefore we have wasted 90% of the energy that could potentially be supplied to ourselves. However you might wonder how the lost in energy could make sense with solving global warming. Now there is another research showing the carbon dioxide exhaled by poultry is surprisingly greater than the emission by vehicles in the world. Personally I don’t like to justify something using results of research, put the deduction aside, the remaining possibilities are what we could reflect on. Being a vegetarian is not merely confined in religious practice, it is a potential way by which human can really save our environment. How if the government starts encouraging the residents by setting a day in every week to take vegetarian food?

Frankly, I’m not a vegetarian, but a vegetarian-to-be, not sure when to become full time vegetarian. I take vegetables whenever possible, and it gives a healthier lifestyle =)

Happy birthday mama!

This is a delayed post, as it is meant to be posted on Thursday, 14-01-2010. Thanks to the half-day breakdown of electricity.


Today is my mother’s birthday!

So now you know this post is dedicated to her =)

Here is some introduction:

My mother, madam Ooi Kim Lee is more conservative than my father. We are less likely to share secret or feeling, but deep inside our heart, both of us know how much we care about each other. The best word to describe her is “moderate”, and, she has the best smile in my eyes =)

Being the first son to leave home in order to seek for a further study, I know how much she misses me, as whenever I occasionally went back to home during holidays, I noticed she would cook my favourite food in almost every meal!

The intriguing thing is that she seldom questioned nor rejected my demands, such as hanging around with friends at night which most of the parents disallow, participating in numberless co-curriculum activities, and asking for more money to spend, therefore normally my requests would be directed to my mother in order to be granted a quick and clear permission without my father’s notice :p

She has been working as a chemistry teacher of a secondary school for a long term of time, that’s why I could still be able to proudly announce chemistry as my “pet subject” despite the fact that I was fairly lazy during the period preparing for SPM examination. Under her experienced guiding, I have developed most of the fundamental and critical concepts that is still currently driving myself through A-Level syllabus in a relatively easy way. She is the best chemistry teacher I have ever had!

I enjoy the moderate freedom and continuous support given by my mother. Although she never voiced out her personal anticipation concerning my future, I do know that she puts so much of her hope on me such that someday she would be able to share the happiness of being excelled under her inculcation.



Maybe she hasn’t realized, I love her as much as she loves me =)

Happy birthday Mama! ;D

Randomly arranged? Designed?

Note: I would like to apologize for not being able to convey my thoughts precisely due to my limited access towards the terminologies involved and scarce proficiency in the language used. Ignore the syntax errors, and try to broaden your mindset to walk with me. This article is not written under the intention of offending nor challenging any believers that hinge to the conviction that our world is created by the only entity namely God. I find it fairly intriguing when I recently discovered I do have some points to raise in response to religious topics which I never really concerned.

To which extent do you believe our world is perfectly designed? You would be indoctrinated by tonnes of preaches convincing you the “truth” since childhood if born in a family held tightly to Christianity. You might question what you had been perceiving, or you might not. Most of those converted clearly understand the conflict they experienced that you might not. To those holding fideism, which compartmentalizes reason and faith, and believes merely on faith, believe or not, the argument that seemed as solid as rock to you has been an object of ridicule in some others eyes, mostly allegedly you may guess, but you should also be careful it is possible that the one with blindfold might not necessarily be those defying your faith.

In this article I focus only on the aspect whether the premise “world is created and perfectly designed” could be a strong argument. In certain books, some experts including scientists pointed out that the discoveries of science are actually in the direction of proving the existence of an intelligent creator. Cosmology, biology, physics and many other fields related on the basis of science are actually contributing to the conviction of theism, according to them. For example, the human genes, the biological molecules are miraculously coordinated. The laws of physics are designed such that the integrative complexity could be resolved using mathematics and logics. No one could explain why the speed of light must be approximately 300000000 metre per second. In similar context, they infer all of these behave beyond the naturalistic explanation. It is unnatural, where there is no chance to have the same situation happening if random ways are to replace it.

They always amaze us by using probability to show us how impossible it could be if random way goes. Yes, random nature is the point I advocate. You tell me in order for the human DNA to function properly, it takes certain probability to account for the systematic and perfect matches by monomers namely nucleotides, and to be able to synthesis proteins using amino acids, so it takes another probability. It goes on until how these biological molecules interact with each other, how the blood clotting mechanism is, how systems in a human body work by calculating the probabilities, and deducing it is almost impossible that human stays alive! You could have told someone, look, the probability is one over ten to the power of integer with astronomical number of digits behind, it is approaching zero, so the world we are living is not randomly arranged! You got a point, I have come across with a lot of so called evidences such as “do you know that if the earth is orbiting slightly nearer or further to the sun, the earth would be either too hot or too cold to sustain life? How amazing!” or “if the universe is expanding at a rate that is a little faster or slower, we could not have a universe that would be capable of supporting life!” They are indeed amazing, but to me it makes no sense to support theism.

People often attribute the fine-tuned universe we are living to the mighty creation by the god simply because it provides a better explanation where science has failed to do so, especially to explain the origin of universe and life. Now try to reflect on the probability. Let say something will happen by the chance of 1/100000000. When it does happen, can we say “99999999 circumstances have failed, and the one happening is right beside us.”? The same logic goes on if you insist to use probability. You say “our universe is created by god because it is fine-tuned!”, why can’t I say “according to your probability 1/N to have such a fine-tuned universe, we can have equal number N-1 of not-fine-tuned universes besides the one we have!”? Isn’t that there are more chances to have something not happening than just happening? As you know universe is vast, who knows there are universes in other dimensions of realms with more physical elements other than just time, space and matter? It could just happen =)

Thank you for finishing my rambling, sorry if you felt offended or annoyed, but that is truly what atheists think, and they may have the same feeling when you say "yours is the wrong one."

Not to forget to thank SuSu my senior who borrowed me the book "The Case For A Creator", I learned a lot =)